Something Beth and I did.

WARNING! THIS IS TACKY, OBSCENE AND OFF-COLOR! You will all like it.




The Sexual Alphabet
A is for abstinence, it's not the way for me
B is for birth control, to keep you baby-free
C is for condom, preservatif in French
D is for douche, to cleanse that foul stench
E is for ecstasy, eyes rolling back in your head
F is for fetish, for animals or the dead
G is for gonorrhea, a nasty STD
H is for handcuffs, which you can always use on me
I is for insomnia, the punishment for sin
J is for juices, flowing right down your chin
K is for Kubrick, his films will leave you wet
L is for lesbian, with one more girl I'm set
M is for monogamy, one at a time, please
N is for naughty, like your head between my knees.
O is for orgasm, I prefer more than just one
P is for penis, for hours of throbbing fun
Q is for queen, a man in drag, my dear
R is for rapture, when you know the end is near
S is for sensuous, when you take it nice and slow
T is for teasing, the only way to go
U is for uvula, when deep-throating, this the tip should touch
V is for vagina and 12 inches is just too much
W is for water-based, the best kind of lube there is
X is for X-rated, like a chest covered in jizz
Y is for yelling, the end result of every game
Z is for Zzzz..., 'cuz face it, most men are just lame.


We had a lot of time on our hands.